Holly and Meagan went to go see N’Sync. Holly paid a ridiculous amount of money for the tickets for her and Meagan, but Meagan loves N’Sync. You know they sing that song “Bye. Bye. Bye.” They went yesterday. Wait……………………………they couldn’t have went yesterday. That’s right, now I’m remembering. It only seems like yesterday, because yesterday is when we moved Meagan to college. How has 1998-2008 passed in the blink of an eye?? Really how has 10/25/89-08/21/2008 passed so quickly?

I have quite a headache this morning. It’s probably good that I’m at work right now, because if I was in a place where I could sob, I would. I’m still choking up if anyone says too much to me, like “how did it go?” It feels like a sudden death. Adam last year, and now Meagan, and the reality is that in the blink of an eye, it will be Chloe. When we finally left yesterday, as we were walking back to the truck I was really crying to the point of embarrassing myself, yet unable to stop. Ali (Meagan’s bff) went with us. I think that made it easier for Meagan and Ali. Ali said “just think, in a few years this will be Chloe.” Mark said “when we move Chloe, I’ll be in a wheelchair.” That made me laugh. For those of you who don’t know, Mark was 38 when we had Chloe.

I guess what made me start crying over and over were the thoughts of Meagan. That loud cackling laugh when she’s with her friends. Her lifetime of hair accessories; ranging room the humongous bows I always made her wear to the hats to the booshkas to the clips. The time I accused Adam(9) of lying, when Meagan(8) said that she didn’t carve that writing into her dresser. (I found out years later that indeed it was lil’ miss innocent) Her love of Winnie-the-Pooh and American Girl dolls until about age 15. **Come to think of it, if we sell all those American Girl dolls we’d have enough money for college!** The time she skipped school, but was so naïve she just went home and got caught all before the first bell. The way she always wants to please people. That inner desire to always hope.

She called me on the way home and again last night. She was good. Really good. I thank God.

Her roomie is a Christian. Nickname is Neesie. Her dad is a coach at Harding HS. I didn’t get much of a chance to speak with her mom, but she seemed nice.

So now as we begin this new chapter with 2 gone, and 1 at home, I’m going to pray God guides them and us, and that He’ll mold all 5 of us into who He wants us to be.

I’ve heard Billy Graham say that what shocked him most about life is how quickly it has flown by. I believe this to be true as I watch my children grow, me and Mark age, our parents age, people who’ve passed both young and old. There is absolutely no doubt we are closer than ever to meeting our Creator, whether through the rapture or death. It will be the blink of an eye.

Have you noticed the sun lately?? Incredible. It’s been these beautiful shades of orange, and at times it hides behind clouds so that you can almost look at it directly. The rays have been powerful and something that could only be orchestrated by God himself. The other night the moon looked almost red. Ask Chloe if you don’t believe me. I am noticing my surroundings more than ever. It’s as if God is saying “I’m coming. I’m here for you. I can see everything going on.